Dear Diary, I’m Not Doing SMART Goals Anymore with Stephanie Rose

We talk with Stephanie Rose of Firefly Scout about using stream-of-consciousness journaling, energy awareness, and human design to turn midlife confusion into clear next steps. Practical stories show how small rituals like walking and flexible goals build self-trust.

• how journaling differs from diary writing
• building self-trust through mind–hand connection
• translating corporate skills into a purpose-led business
• women’s midlife crossroads and agency
• human design as a curiosity tool, not a label
• setting flexible, energy-aligned goals
• walking, voice notes, and simple daily rituals
• tracking glimmers and collecting evidence
• using patterns to renegotiate work and boundaries
• resources and where to find Stephanie online

Send me a text. We'd love to hear your opinion on the human design or anything that we've talked about.
Check it out at divatonight.buzzsprout.com
Send us a message on Instagram at Diva underscore tonight

Chapters

• 0:00 Meet Stephanie And Firefly Scout
• 1:00 Stream-Of-Consciousness Journaling Awakens Clarity
• 3:34 Leaving Corporate And Translating Skills
• 5:12 Managing Stakeholders Of Your Life
• 5:40 Midlife Crossroads For Women 40–49
• 6:42 Why Journaling Builds Self-Trust
• 9:10 Using Writing To Reshape Work
• 12:04 Childhood Writing, Work Rhythms, And Energy
• 17:44 Human Design As A Curiosity Tool
• 22:42 Journaling That Guides Flexible Goals
• 33:12 Non-Writers: Walks, Voice Notes, Prompts
• 38:38 Six-Month Reset: Follow Your Glimmers
• 41:36 Links, Thanks, And How To Connect

Transcript

Stephanie Rose: 0:02

Hi, I'm Carlene and this is Diva. Tonight I have with me on Zoom Stephanie Rose, and she is the creator of Firefly Scouts. She has a very interesting background when it comes to energy work. She knows a bit about the human design and also journaling. I'm gonna get to that because I think it's very important. Because in this day and age with technology, I find like journaling is something that maybe not many people do so much anymore. I'm not saying I don't have any stats to back that up, but I feel like we text more than we write, and vice versa. And so, Firefly Scout, tell me more about that. What brought on this endeavor?

Carlene: 0:56

Well, I'm excited to talk with you about all the things. Yay! Firefly Scout came to be as I was like a midlife mom, like finally starting to get enough sleep and like went on my own self-discovery journey of like, who am I? What do I want? The old ways weren't quite working anymore. But I didn't know where that next direction was, and having like taken on this new identity of being a mom while working in corporate, and you know, like trying to live my life and like those old parts of you that are still like wanting to show up too. So I was trying to like figure all of that out. And journaling is actually what sparked all of that. Um, I had done a program called The Artist's Way, which promotes like stream of consciousness journaling, and I had never done it that way. I was always more of like a diary writer. Like today I did this and listing more like facts and details versus getting and into anything that was like feelings, or if I did, I was very like cagey or sketchy about actually like writing them down. And so this like stream of consciousness journaling was such a freeing way, like even if whatever I was putting on the page was just whatever flowed out, it created space, mental, emotional space for me to like organize some thoughts and tie up some loose ends with things. And then as I had more space, then I had like ideas that I wanted to explore and just like well, what if? And then it started to feel like more creative and it became like something I could really count on to like have the outlet to just pour it out again. Even if it wasn't like all like such profound things, it was just a great way to like word vomit everything out and just even like I'm sitting here at the counter and I don't know what to write, and but today was this, and then just wherever it flowed. So through that, I I got enough or my thoughts started to organize enough, and like I want to do something to really help others with this. Cause like I was realizing like I'm not alone in this kind of lost and stuck feeling. And so then I started to pull it together into a business, really getting in touch with what you feel. And it's not even just like your feelings, but just like noticing like the energy within you and like kind of like what you sense and what what you need, like those parts of you need, so you can actually respond to them and fulfill it. So that's how it all came to be and really did evolve from journaling.

Stephanie Rose: 3:34

So you said you left corporate America. So what were you doing before you started a Firefly Scout?

Carlene: 3:43

I was doing like program management, working with um in a manufacturing setting to making sure that the dealers were getting product and completing their projects on time. So it was there was a lot of like relationships there and communication and processes and you know, following protocols both within our corporate, with our clients' corporate, with the dealers that each had their own set of things. So it was really like a lot of balls in the air, and like seeing that you know, something that happened in one realm actually had ripple effects somewhere else, and trying to keep all that in mind so that everyone was like on board and understood why some we were doing something here that didn't make sense to them.

Stephanie Rose: 4:32

So, how do you feel like that industry, like being a project manager, helped you with your business now?

Carlene: 4:40

Managing chaos is really like just a life skill we all need. I just got paid for it in that capacity. Um but just seeing like you have so many like stakeholders with different versions of success to them, like success for the client means something different than success to you as the manufacturer, and something else to like the installer or the end user. So, like understanding, like I've always been really good at seeing other people's points of view and kind of mediating all of that to help bridge the gaps that people might have between uh what's in what's important in their world and what's important in the other people's worlds. And so I'm kind of carrying that into the business of like doing that just for yourself and being able to handle all the stakeholders of people in your life and really just give yourself some perspective to see it that way instead of being caught in the swirl of all the things, yeah.

Stephanie Rose: 5:40

Speaking of all the things, like we're all busy working, trying to manage everything. Before we get into what you help your clients do and like what you help other women do, this podcast is a series devoted to women in their 40s. And so with that being said, do you feel like at this stage in life, women who are 40 to 49, that it's kind of like a crossroads where you're like figuring your life out, but also dealing with like possible health concerns and doing the things, right? What do you think is more important now than ever before? Like in terms of setting goals and changing careers if you have to? Like, I guess I'm asking more than one question, but the main question is with journaling, how do you feel from how it would help anyone now that's struggling with life and their goals?

Carlene: 6:42

40s is like really prime for this type of confusion because up until this point, you've probably been living up to some sort of storyline that you've been following, like education, career, family, you know, becoming an adult, stabilizing in that. And then you the roadmap kind of ends in just like, oh, until retirement. Like there's this like big gap. So you're like right at the beginning of this gap until you hit the this mysterious realm of retirement. And so this is the time where you might start to like kind of look around and realize, like, is this even where I wanted to end up? Is this the trajectory I want to stay on for the next 20 years? And so it can be confusing to really realize, like, oh, like maybe I didn't have as much agency in my life as I thought, because subconsciously I was following this path that has been kind of pushed on us, like to go of what success looks like. And it's not bad, but you're you're just like, is this all there is now? Like you're kind of doing like and then you realize like you actually have the power to like choose your next thing. Like, are you gonna stay in that job? Are you gonna is there a dream in your heart that like you've been ignoring? And there's maybe a little bit more capacity to like uh start listening. And in this range, you're starting to see like your parents getting older and or just witnessing more people like maybe having some end of life uh regrets or wishes that like because their time like their end is very close. So like where that horizon line has felt just so far away in your 40s, you're starting to notice like there really is an end point, and it starts creating that little bit of time pressure on you because it doesn't feel so infinite anymore. And that's where journaling can be really helpful because when we just stay in our head and the swirl of the thoughts and the feelings, and we don't like get them anchored out and like really like we have feelings and things that cannot have they don't have the access to words, but we have to try. And so when you pause long enough to journal and just let things just flow out and don't censor what you're saying or trying to like shape into cohesive thoughts that you know are gonna be so meaningful to you later, like taking that time to pause, like one, we're not rewarded for rest. The idea of saying, Well, I took a mental break and wrote out my feelings is not something we like get celebrated for. Right, right, yeah. And then like just kind of like anchoring some things, like getting it onto the page that the mind-hand connection to like physically write it out, like it's an expression out of you. Like your handwriting is an expression of you. And so, like you can look at your handwriting and see like kind of how you're feeling, like it's a reflection of it. Like if you're if it's really tight and cramped, like that can actually be assigned to you, like, oh, like I'm actually feeling something maybe different than I thought underneath because it's coming through and on literally on the page. And like like you censor yourself so much, but when you can just free yourself from that and just get it onto the page, like you just start to build that sense of trust with what your heart is really saying and things that really need to come out, and you're addressing like that mental energy within you and your emotional energy to like help put some sense to what you're doing, and that and you have some evidence of like what things keep coming up because you wrote them down. You can go back to them and be like, I've been saying this a lot. And it's one thing if you say it to a friend or like they're not as gonna call you out on it, or they may not notice you know the pattern you keep saying, but when you write it down, that gives you just more of a concrete thing of like, I've been saying this a lot lately, and then that can help you know build some problem awareness awareness of like where you need to focus, like your energy next.

Stephanie Rose: 11:01

So for you, I remember reading on Firefly Scout that you journaled for is it almost a year? Like you were on this path where you didn't take a break from journaling. It was kind of like uh, well, more or less the self-discovery.

Carlene: 11:18

Yeah, like the artist's way is like a 12-week program that you can do, but then I was getting so much out of it, like I kept going, like maybe not as regularly, but still just really using that as a way to like keep letting stuff out and like refining it.

Stephanie Rose: 11:36

Just getting it out of the swirl of my head to like a more grounded place. And when you did that, what did you discover about yourself?

Carlene: 11:47

It gave me a chance to really like honor, like, you know, maybe what I'm missing in life, like where I thought I'd be right now, what I thought this stage of life would feel like, gave me space to like be honest about like what I do and don't like about stuff, especially like career-wise, with things of like the obligations that it puts on you, and realizing like I didn't fit into the role anymore. So through that, as I kept going with it, when there was a time for to like re kajigger like job responsibilities, I used journaling and some list making to just really pick apart, like what did I really love doing in life and in my job and uh all the things with that? But so I can really like start to differentiate what did I actually love to do, what was uh really stressful for me to do? What was like not a growth kind of friction, but just like a tension that wasn't expanding me and really like explore those nuances. And because I had it written down, I like come back and reference it and refer back to it, and then use that. Like like I said, in my job then when we were kind of rearranging responsibilities, I could better articulate like this is what I love doing, this is what makes work and life feel good for me. And it worked out like by me saying what I love to do, by all the things I could say yes to, I actually didn't have to say all the things that I didn't like doing because I was inviting all these things, like, yes, this these are the things I'm really great at doing. I want to put part of my responsibility. And as a result, like I won't have time for these things now, but I didn't have to say like why to like because like a lot of travel was tough doing um like RFP deadline based things that was like conducive to uh young motherhood. Like I I didn't have that availability on tight time frames. Like didn't mean I couldn't do the work, it just that type of work wasn't aligned for me. So like it just gave me so much more confidence to say, like, no, this is what I really love doing, and this is what I don't, without having to say I can't do that anymore. Like, not letting those realities of other parts of my life like hold me back. So that was another way, like taking the time to like write it out and notice these things and being really curious about like where your energy flows naturally makes it so much makes life so much easier.

Stephanie Rose: 14:25

So when we think about like who you are now and where the path took you, let's go from the beginning. It's always interesting to hear how people like how their journey has gotten them. Like it's I always say this, it's not where you're going, it's where you came from. And the journey to get there obviously took you to where you are now. And this company you created to help women with their goals, their ambitions, and just the process of figuring who you are out. So when you were younger, did you like to write? Was journaling a big thing for you? What were what interested you when you were a kid?

Carlene: 15:11

I did journal some. Like I said, it was more of like a diary entry. Like, you know, I worked at a movie theater. So, like who I worked with, how many cotton candy bags I did that day. Like, like, yes, there were some feelings in there, but it was because I thought that's how you were supposed to do it.

Stephanie Rose: 15:29

Like, yeah, like I remember, like, you know, you watch these shows, like, and the girl's always writing her journal or her diary, dear diary, today, you know. Like, if you watch, I remember Harrier the Spy, where she didn't write the typical journal, but she was a spy, so she used that as a way. But like all these other shows, like me too. I used to write a diary because I was just like, that was the one way I could release, like write out my feelings, you know, at a as a young child. Like I always wrote, and then from journaling, I would write poems, you know what I mean? And so I remember writing this one poem that won this little contest in school or whatever. I think it was like the news lab newspaper. So writing has always been my thing too, and it's helped me remember because my short-term memory is horrible. Like, and you know, I know that for a fact when I get introduced to people, I'm like, what's their name again? But like getting back to the journaling thing, obviously it's a there's a little part of it that was part of like your growing up and working at the movie theater. So, do you like movies? Was that like a thing for you as well?

Carlene: 16:35

No, that was more it was a cool place to work. And yeah, my parents said, if you want a car, you gotta get a job. So I went and got a job. But I did like it because like it had you weren't always on, like, yes, you're dealing with a lot of people, but in between shows, it's quiet. So, like that kind of rhythm actually works for me. I didn't know it at the time, but like if you were doing something in retail where like you're just dealing with customers like all the time, like I don't think I could handle that. But knowing like there is this pattern, I could anticipate and prepare for it, like, and it was like okay, and you know, fun people to work with too.

Stephanie Rose: 17:16

Yeah, it's interesting you say that because I work in retail with lots of people, and I think like after a day of dealing with people, I need the downtime because it's it takes a lot of energy to deal with people, to answer questions, to deal with like coworkers' different moods and like be on it all the time. So yeah, it's definitely a thing. And for whoever's listening, it's very interesting because Stephanie and I spoke prior and we're both April babies. And so I'm April 11th and you're the 13th. And I think it's very interesting how you know we connected um the way we did. And so, as part of that, I think it's interesting because I didn't tell you, I didn't, I don't know if I sent you my human design report because we were talking about that as well. And I totally forgot to send you what it is, but I know I'm a generator, and so I give off energy. People can sense it. Like I've had so many people tell me they're like, I can tell you're a people person, or like there's just something about that.

Carlene: 18:17

So I don't know if you know what you are, if you're a generator as well, or what your human design is, but I'm actually a splenic projector, and I only learned that a few years ago, but I was always like on the fringe of like, oh, like, yeah, let me read my horoscope type thing, like in the magazine, but I never like cared about so much. But um, a few years ago I was introduced to human design. I'm like, oh, that's interesting, like, yeah, it makes sense. And I was busy doing other things, like getting the business going. And then I came back to that report and I was like, oh, like there's a lot here. And it gave me like more words to understand or things like notice, like, oh, I never noticed that about my energy before. And so now in hindsight, I'm like, well, of course that worked for me or didn't work for me, because that's not how I best operate to know myself. So, like working at the movie theater, like because I could like there were like the rhythms through the time, like based on when the shows were, that's when we would be busy or not busy. And I could like know that it'll only be busy for like 30 minutes, and then it'll calm back down, and then we can do more, like you know, the cleaning, the resetting and stuff. And that way, and when you're at a movie theater, you're just selling tickets, selling concessions, or like people aren't coming at you with a whole bunch of different requests, like you're doing like one kind of narrow focused thing, and like that worked well for me. But if like fielding a lot of like requests from all over the place, like that can be more taxing in some ways, so like it's not as aligned for me. Yeah, because like other people's energy just it's too much pinging off of me, so it's having a moment. Like, there's so many things that go beyond just like your type with it, but yeah, uh yeah, like learning that flavor of astrology was like, oh, because I was already invested in knowing myself and figuring these things out about myself, but it just gives you like kind of like a map to start being curious about, like with some names. Like, is this me? Like, yes, and like with my astrology, I never really resonated with my sun sign until I heard like the right interpretation of it. I'm like, oh now I see, like, as an Aries, they always say it's like leader and bold. I'm like, that's not quite me. But then I heard that it could be like a pioneering type energy, like, and that resonated more because it's like, no, I love exploring and figuring out new things, and it's just finding like the right words, just tying back into the journaling. You you find the right words to explain what you sense or you feel, and like everything changes for you.

Bruce Hayward : 21:16

Diva tonight, glamour for your ears. This is 40, a female perspective.

Stephanie Rose: 21:23

You know, sometimes I feel like the universe connects us with people that will that we need or that are gonna help you. And I think even through this community pod match, I've met some very, very smart people. And like I'm sensing with you that we have a lot in common. We I mean, we did when we first talked, but the more you tell me about the things that you like and the things that you do, like I spent like yourself a lot of time reading. Reading was my escape. I read all the Anna Green Gables books. I read like whenever the chaos was happening in my in my childhood, my escape was the library, the quiet place. Like it was like for me, I loved it there. I spent so many hours in the library, and and now that I'm older, I don't read as much. I still have books and I I'm trying to read more, but yeah, it's it was it was a thing. I I was obsessed with it to the point where my mom's friend was like, Don't you think you might go a little crazy from all that reading? I'm like, no, I don't think so. In my mind, I didn't think it was. I thought it was it was great, you know what I mean? This is like another place, just like the movies, right? Is another form of escape from reality and like it gives you that either that happy ending or that message or something, right?

Carlene: 22:45

Yeah, because storytelling relies on like archetypes and the natural expression of them, and there is a flow to a story that feels satisfying to us. Like we all you've maybe read or watched some things like, oh, like that didn't follow the flow of like how a story is supposed to go, and they may have done it intentionally to like jar you into thinking, or it was just poor storytelling. But I love reading and stories because I think it gives you a chance not even to escape, but maybe even see something about you in those and some plant some seeds of possibility, like well, that character did this. Like when they rent faced something that was challenging, what did they do?

Stephanie Rose: 23:31

Right.

Carlene: 23:31

And it it maybe isn't even that conscious that you're like aware you're monitoring that, but I started doing that with the books that I read, like, oh, like noticing like the arc of the story, like, oh yeah, there's 50 pages left that the crisis is gonna happen, they're gonna um the misunderstanding is gonna happen. But using that in your own life, like to understand, like you're gonna have misunderstandings, you're gonna have a crisis, you're gonna have something where everything seems like it's falling apart. And but how do they figure it out? What did they do? Did they just give up? Be like, yes. Yeah, like in that way, like that love of story can really help you like stay optimistic that like there's a way through. And if it's not that it has to be a happily ever after, but if there's not like a satisfying epilogue to it, the story's not over.

Stephanie Rose: 24:19

Yeah. Well, you know, I always refer to either music or movies. So when you say the crisis, I think of the movie our brand is crisis. This is a good movie. It's a sad movie. I saw it at TIF years ago, but alluding to that, I think though, you know, like you were saying with the whole reading, how it can help you figure out how you are as a person. And so is there a character that you find that you identify with?

Carlene: 24:49

I've read a few books that like leave me with like a book hangover of like, oh, like even if it's not like I see myself so much as the character, but just like the journey that they went through, you feel you get so attached to it that it like kind of sticks with you. Like you can't shake it off. So I had one, it was by Annabelle Monahan. I don't remember which one it was.

Stephanie Rose: 25:13

Okay.

Carlene: 25:13

Because I've read all her books, but all of hers are good. It'll come to me. I wasn't prepared.

Stephanie Rose: 25:20

It's the name of the I know, I know. I didn't tell you, I didn't tell you the things. I told you some things, but we won't talk about books too much. I just thought it was interesting that we both have that in common and also the the whole thing with being in Aries and being like the leader, the center of attention, whereas sometimes I don't want to be like you, the center of attention. I don't want to be. I can be. In many instances, I feel like I can be, but then sometimes I'm like, I just want to like hide and not, you know, be there. But what I want to say is that with human design, I didn't learn about it until my sister brought it up. And she was like, Oh, did you ever hear about the human design? I'm like, no, what is that? And then so I looked into it and then I got my report and I was like, wow, this is so interesting. This is like another part of me that I didn't know, like how your energy could dictate like everything in your life. You know what I mean? Like the path that you're going to, your career, uh, people that you meet. And so it's another self-discovery, I think, in a way. Like I think human design, you're the first person I've met who has that on their resume as something that they're familiar with. And you said you're still learning about it. So I thought that was so interesting because it's different than, you know, like you said, astrology and the things, right? So what do you what do you think is um important to know about human design?

Carlene: 26:50

Like, I think it's important to like to approach it with curiosity. Okay. You don't have to believe that the moment you were born dictates your energy, like from a cosmic way. Yeah. Like if you can suspend that part of it, just be like, just approach it with the interest and curiosity of like, does this sound like me? And if you pair it with your own contemplation and your own self-knowledge that you're discovering, it can be a really powerful tool to help you like start looking first at something versus like having everything that you're curious about. If you're like, well, what you know, like what makes me feel grounded? What how am I meant to be like radiant or shine? What does following my purpose look like? And if you ask or approach it from like the storytelling standpoint of like what is the story of this energy, see how it resonates with you. And if it doesn't, don't worry about it. But if you're feeling lost or stuck, like it is a great place to start giving you some hooks and some words to start kind of making your list of like, oh yeah, that sounds like me. And I use the human design paired with the glow map that I came up with of like just understanding your energy inside of you, like what you feel. So, like how you your sense of how you feel physically, emotionally, mentally. What does your spiritual energy feel like? What's your connection energy feel like? And then you can get curious of like, well, like what are the rhythms that work well for me? What are the creative outlets that really like light me up, that make me feel like the most to me? It's not meant to define you, it is meant to just help you explore your curiosity about yourself with a little bit more like focus.

Stephanie Rose: 28:49

Yeah. No, I think I think it's true. I read about it briefly, like I've done some research on it, but it's still an ongoing process, I think, for sure. And I think like the whole thing with journaling and you know, journaling is so helpful. Like, I think the more I do it, the more I understand it. But I think they say it's more of an internal thing. So, what do you think about that? Like journaling and just being curious, because we talked about two different things journaling, journaling and the human design, which is obviously a way to understand who you are, or just to be curious about other forms of, I guess it's more of like a personality test or personality uh synopsis of who you are and how you can figure out what your gifts are, or you know, just self discovery in a way, right? So, with journaling, how does it help you with your goals and setting goals? And I think that's a lot, a lot of things, a lot of conversations are happening with that, like setting goals and realizing where you want your future to go, like in the next. A month or three months, you know.

Carlene: 30:02

Journaling is a great way to like bridge that connection from your head to your heart, that like like your intuition, like what it really wants you to know. But the thoughts, fears, limitations, the stories that your head is living by sometimes don't let you. But when you can like write it out on the page and like just get things flowing and moving and they're not as sticky, then like those truths can start to come out. And then you start noticing those. And then if you understand your human design as like an added layer of it, you can start to know like what your intuition, like how it speaks to you. And it also helps you notice what you are and how other people are. Like other people have different energy, they operate in different ways. So then maybe you don't take something as personally because you actually understand how their energy works too. And it's different than yours. And so, like, that's why there's frictions or tensions, but it doesn't mean either of you are doing anything wrong. It just means that like you're different, and so that can open you up to more empathy and understanding of other people because you're not so caught up in your world, you're actually connected into that space of you, and you can approach maybe other people with more understanding that they just operate differently than you. All of that can help you set goals that are actually meaningful to you in a way that will spell out success for you. Like if you've created like smart goals, specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-sensitive or something. Yeah. Like those are great. Like, that's very like rigid thinking, like, I will do this for this, this, and I will get this result. Like, well, one, you don't know if doing it that way is gonna get you the result. Two, does that mean you failed if you miss a day or you don't get the result even though you followed it? Like if it was like weight loss for something, like, and you lost like 9.8 pounds and you want to lose 10, does that mean you failed your goal? Like, no, like it helps you start setting goals that are much more like meaningful to you and the journey that you're on, the type of growth that you want to see. So, like I had a goal that I started almost six years ago. Like, I wanted to show up for myself, I wanted to finish the year strong, like I want to feel like physically strong, like like I wasn't moving enough. I wanted to like do a workout. And so I had kind of like played with it and like, okay, no, December 1st, doing like 30 days. I'm gonna finish the year strong. I wanted to have that confidence. I thought that would be like give me the confidence, like, look, I can do this, I can show up for myself and all these other ways. And I did. And then I'm like, well, let's start the year strong. Like that feels like good energy. And then, you know, kept going. That's like, well, let's do 90 days, like, let's see. And then that was back at the end of 2019 into 2020. And so I was still going strong when COVID hit. And so suddenly that goal that I had of showing up for myself out of a place of strength, like of physically showing up for myself, became a goal of showing up for myself mentally, because like, you know, we were so scared, and it was like there's so much happening. Like, I needed that safe space to like step away and like just connect with nature and be like, our worlds are like so chaotic, but look, nature is still happening, like there is still a rhythm, there are still seasons that are happening, like there's still some order in this life. So then that's what kept me going because that's the goal. Like the goal changed, even though I was still showing up for a walk every day. The intent of the goal of that action changed. And now almost six years later, I'm still doing that. I'm still showing up for myself in a walk every day. And now it's just part of my rhythm of like my energy actually needs that reset every day to like step away and take a breath. And it's actually a space where I get my like creative stuff out because I get so many ideas when I'm walking and moving my body that like it's actually part of my growth for my business now. Because like I can count on that time to like I'll never be stuck for ideas because I have this space to talk it through and or listen to a podcast that gives me the next spark of something. So that's the kind of goal setting. Like, you want something that can actually support you through whatever you need and have it be flexible enough to go with you, not be so specific and measurable. Like I never fail. If I showed up, I never failed myself. Like, and then being gentle enough to know, like, there's gonna be some days where it's really hard to show up. So I've also had to work through my relationship of like perfectionism and you know, that like, oh my god, I can't fail my goal like each day. So I've also learned a lot about myself on that front. It's the goal that keeps teaching.

Stephanie Rose: 35:10

Yes, it is. Yeah, you know what? I find walks for me, like they just remind me, like where I am. I live in Toronto and further out, like an hour from Toronto, and like there's a lot of trees in the area where I am, which is great because I find like nature is always very helpful with that. But when you talk about like you setting your goals and doing the things and like the goal that you did have a few years back, for people who don't journal or they're not really big on writing, what do you say to them? Like, how do you set the goals there?

Carlene: 35:44

I think that's you need to like if you're not journaling now, like maybe experiment with like, can you write it out enough to help open that connection? Or um can you take yourself for a walk and just ask yourself questions as you walk? Because I also find like when you're moving your body, you're like changing your mind, because like that energy is moving in you, you're not so stuck, like when you're at a desk all day or you're caught up in the energy of other people all day, like it's really hard to like tune in to you. And so if you can step away and like just like you know, get your body moving. And I've done it like where I do voice notes to myself and I ask myself a question and I speak it back out, and I'll record myself just so in case something comes up that I'm like, what did I say? I can go back to often I don't, but it's like there are times I just know that if I'm really trying to talk through a process or something, like I will write it or voice note it just so I can have it. And it's like any other way to like open up that curiosity and connection with yourself. And to start, it does it probably does need to look like stepping away. And if you it makes you feel energized to like be like alone together with people, like finding someone like, hey, like doing a journal together for a few minutes, or do you want to or can I talk this out to you? Like any way to really like free yourself up to start communicating with yourself in a safe space. And so I find it easier to do with myself because I don't want to hear what other people have to say. I don't want to censor myself sharing it with anyone else yet. So yeah, I'd say walk, try to write it out or yeah.

Stephanie Rose: 37:35

No, I think uh even voice notes, like you said, like sending a voice memo to yourself, that's another way of doing it too, and talking, asking yourself those questions, which is so true, right? So it's it's very interesting, the whole idea of journaling, because I think for me, like even just writing down like the things that you like to do when you were younger that you still like to do now. Like it's it's it's one of those things that reflecting back on those things, that's how you figure out, oh yeah, that's what I like to do. Or, you know, but getting back to the theme of the show, which is this is 40, a female experience, like a female perspective in that sense. So for the female listener, or just I mean, you have a lot of clients obviously that you help. What is your advice for the next six months of the year? Because like we're getting towards the end, like half of the year already. And so, what advice do you give to someone who wants to work on like a goal?

Carlene: 38:38

I would say like start finding ways to tune in to your intuition and like what it has to tell you, and notice the things that catch your attention that like give you that spark of like energy that, like, oh, like maybe like out of nowhere type thing to like, oh, like I was really energized talking to that person. That like that really lit me up, and then get curious, like, well, is it what we talked about, who we talked about, like where we were, like, yeah. And just like that, that's where the list making can be really helpful. Like, just start collecting those little glimmers. Like, that's why Firefly Scout is part of the name. It's like those little fireflies, like those little things that make those little glimmers in the night are what make the dark not so scary. It can transform the whole experience instead of feeling like lost in the unknown. Like, you're looking for those glimmers that suddenly make it like a magical evening, like that gives you like a sense of peace and calm. So I would say start noticing what your how your intuition talks to you. Mine feels more like cotton candy wisps.

Stephanie Rose: 39:47

Like, yeah, yeah.

Carlene: 39:49

Like, oh, like it's not very specific, but it'll just kind of be like, oh, that was like a wisp of something. Like, what was that? And then I I know, like, I'm never gonna get that definitive, like, it was this. I think that's like, oh, like I'll start like getting like little tastes of something, and then so I'll just try to like capture those down. As a generator type, you'll get like literal like gut checks, like yes, like that feels like a yes in your body. So just learn whatever yes feels like to you. And so my my yes feels like oh, like I feel that little twinkly wisp going by for others. It's like that literal gut check. Other times it's that sense of clarity that comes through, like after you feel all the things, like just knowing like when you feel most clear on that yes in you, and then start writing it down, just a simple list. Um I call evidence, and so it's just the evidence of like what that is, and then start to see like, are those leading you somewhere? Are those drawing you toward an opportunity? Is that telling you like what your heart really wants you to do? And you know, does that look like learning something new to expand your education so you can grow in your career? Is it helping you notice like a relationship that's not serving you? Is it time to like have you outgrown something? Like sometimes those signals don't always feel so good because it it's actually time for you to like expand and level up, and using that to help set some goals for you and like the journey for like the next six months.

Stephanie Rose: 41:30

Yeah, definitely. This has been a very interesting conversation indeed. I'm Carlene, and this is Diva tonight with Stephanie Rose of Firefly Scout. Um, if you want to check her out on social media, she's on Instagram, Firefly Scout. I just followed you today. And you can also check her out online. What's the website?

Carlene: 41:56

It's Firefly Scout.com.

Stephanie Rose: 41:59

And if you like the show, check it out at divatonight.buzzsprout.com. Send me a text. We'd love to hear your opinion on the human design or anything that we've talked about. I think it's been an interesting conversation about journaling and the human design and just figuring out what your little firefly is, you know, in a way. So thank you so much, Stephanie, for taking the time to share what you do and how you got there. It's been great.

Carlene: 42:33

Thank you, Carlene. It's been a very fun journey with you. For sure, definitely.

Bruce Hayward : 42:38

Diva Tonight with Carlene will be back. Send us a message on Instagram at Diva underscore tonight.